Days with the Dorans

In kindergarten, Jonasen had to recall all of his birthdays and write about them and draw a picture. This one was my favorite. You may not be able to make out the words (though he did do a GREAT job at hearing sounds and recording them)- which are, "When I was three I had curly hair." Now look at the picture!

Because my back hasn't been the greatest and I do have only one more weekend before delivering Baby F... I decided to pretend it is already October... (OK-so I'm shy a few days...) Jonasen was SO excited to get out the Halloween decorations! He pulled his dad down in the basement to help with the boxes, but he was more excited to paint pumpkins on the front window than anything else! Before they could paint though, I told the kids they needed to clean the window- which they had a BLAST doing! (And did a pretty good job too...) Next I painted the outline of the pumpkins in black and they waited so patiently for me to finish. When the time came to get the orange paint for the pumpkins, I thought I was in some big trouble! I did not have enough left for all three kids so I began to panic... but then like any teacher- I thought of a lesson in colors... We did have some red and yellow so we mixed them together to make some orange. Each kid got their own little cup filled with pa...

So with a blog about Joey's birthday party, you may be wondering why I would begin with a picture of Zach... Well... Zach is the reason that the guest list was changed. The poor little man was sick for over a week and so we uninvited everyone and had a more 'intimate' party of just us. There were no games, but Daddy did rent a Scooby Doo movie for the kids to watch while Joe wore his 'birthday crown' from school. And we did have a few presents we didn't give him on his 'real' birthday- so he did get to open some gifts. Nana and Papa came by for about a half hour too to drop off some gifts, sing and have some cake. And though this certainly was the "year of the Transformers," Jonasen is a lover of books and was excited to get this book about Super Why one of his favorite shows on PBS (and as a teacher, I love it too!) I didn't make the cake this year, instead I bought it from Hillers and Jonasen was so excited to see the...

And so this is the September 15 th post about Jonasen - And yet- typical as my typical September 15 ths go... this one did not turn out as planned... Jonasen woke up so excited to go to school- Ali Jane, Zach and I got to get him on the bus- I've never seen him actually get on the bus before... gulp- but any melancholy moment was shattered by Zach crying for the bus and chasing after it... yes- I said chasing- and then me chasing after him... (You get the picture- I guess I should thank him for killing the 'moment'...) I was so excited to bring Joey's cupcakes up to his school to celebrate and about 5 minutes before I left, my phone rang- his school- he was sick- and needed to go home. As I came to the office, he fell into my arms crying because of his coughs and runny nose. I felt so sad for him. His teacher said we could still pass out the cupcakes so he mustered up a smile while his peers sang to him. It was so sweet to see him with his new friends. I only w...

There will always be two September 15 ths for me- one remember-ing my Andrew, and one celebrating my Jonasen . This post of course is about my first born- who you don't hear much about (at least on this blog)- or perhaps don't think much about- but I do. There's a reason why I take off each September 15 th . As far as I have come in my grief of losing Andrew, this day- THIS day- is one that I have yet to get through without shedding tears for what could have been if it weren't for September 15 th ... For he would have been six today- SIX! And it's hard to believe... I started my day getting Joey on the bus. One son- and that started it off a bit- sometimes it comes so quickly- just a snapshot- a boy next to him in my mind- he was there and as soon as I try to focus... he's gone. And that is what has come in and out of these last six years- I see him for a second- and he's gone- like a butterfly that flew away too soon... my butterfly. I hugged the doctors...

Last night, like most nights recently, I was tired. Jonasen had a bit of a runny nose- but after baths, stories and prayers- all the kids were kissed and tucked in their beds- Poor Joey was up a few times and I would walk him back to his room... rub his tummy... pray... and tuck him back in. The last time he was up was midnight so I still had about 6 hours to get some much needed shut eye. Overall we've been lucky- Joe's had two times where he was sick throwing up- but overall our kids have been very healthy- never really had any meds , fevers, injuries (other than Z's temper tantrum last Christmas)... ( Hmmm ... I hope I'm not jinxing myself by writing this...) And then at about 12:30 I heard..." Mommmeeeeee ." It was Zach- I went in and tucked him in again and rubbed his back- then back to sleep myself. About a half hour later, I heard him again- this time he was wheezing and coughing a bit and it sounded a little croupy- so Jeff got up and brought him ...

Joe could hardly contain his excitement when he woke up that first day of school... "MOM! MOM! WE'VE GOT TO CALL DAD AND TELL HIM I'M A KINDERGARTNER!" (Dad was already at work.) His joy tugged at my heart a little... as I thought of his story- the sweet little boy that he is... I couldn't believe I was letting him go! Nana took him that first day since we both couldn't miss 'our' first days of school. I am so thankful that she is our 'family photographer' and grabbed some pics for me. While I did call and check to see how the morning went, I didn't have to rely on her observations alone because Jonasen was quick to give us the play-by-play of his first day of school... "Mom! There are three new friends and one has the same backpack as me, one has the same shoes as me and one has the same lunchbox as me but they are three friends- We read a book about a raccoon and they kissed his hand- I sit at the blue table- I eat in a ...

I've decided to do two posts to describe 'Back to School' for the Dorans . Because we're both teachers and couldn't miss our first day of work, my mom came to take Joey to Kindergarten, while I took Ali Jane and Zach back to preschool. The first day went so smoothly! Zach went right into his classroom with his 'backpack' (See the next post) and waved goodbye happily. This was good for me since I was a little emotional at seeing my oldest baby off to kindergarten... Zach's always been one to separate easily from his mom and Dad. I have to admit that the rest of the week didn't go quite as smoothly and he has been a bit clingy with me when I have dropped him off and even shed a few tears... (sigh) And then there is my sweet Ali Jane- who has/was and probably always will be clingy when I drop her off. There were no surprises here... She doesn't like to go... and she doesn't like to leave... She was especially angry when I picked th...

'Twas the night before school when all through our house- not a creature was stirring.... Wait a minute- that's a lie- there was a creature stirring and it was our Zach! He was so very excited to get his new 'backpack', (You and I would call it a lunchbox) that he carried it along with him all night... while he got ready for bed... while we read stories... even while he brushed his teeth. He was very upset when I tried to take it from him. Once I laid him down in his crib he cried all the more for his 'backpack', so I decided it was no big deal... I'd wait for him to fall asleep and then I'd get it and run downstairs to make lunches. So I sat in my room and waited. Silence... Then... Zzzzzip ...... Zzzzzip .... Zzzzzip ..... Silence again... Was it safe? I tiptoed to his room and then... Zzzzzzip ..... Zzzzzzzzip ... Zzzzzzip ... So I worked on my crossword puzzle and waited and suddenly the zips were replaced by the rhythmic breathing of our sweet li...

It's September and as it unfolds before me, I can feel the emotions start to swirl inside. Six years. He'd be going to kindergarten this year- and that kills me- it kills us- we've talked about it and though the peace in knowing he's o.k. is there- it still hurts- missing him- and wondering what it would be like to be sending them off together- on that first day... And then it was also September- Last year when our little spark went out- the screen went black and we lost our Baby E. Damn September. And yet it was September that made me a mommy- and September that gave me my Jonasen - who has been a pillar of strength to me- How can I not be thankful for the miracle of September? Which is why I am putting this 'pause' blog on this blog and not the other... it's an everyday occurrence that is on my mind... What's happening now. The good teacher in me got Joey a writer's notebook- I showed him mine and how I put things I like in it- stories that are i...

I've said it before and I'll say it again... A bonus for marrying Jeff was that he has lots of thick, curly hair. (Though you wouldn't know it since he buzzes it all off every couple weeks...) My hair on the other hand is thin, bone straight, and fine. (The worst combination possible in my opinion...) So what happened when we had children??? Well our boys got Jeff's beautiful hair and Ali Jane... well- she got mine... Her hair is fairly easy to cut- so I'd been just trimming the back and her bangs this last year, but since Joe and I were going for a cut- she wanted to come too- and when Ms. Diane asked her how she should cut her hair, Ali Jane wanted it "short like mom's". I absolutely LOVE IT! But was sweating while she was getting it cut... not because I was worried about what it looked like or that I wanted it long- but Ali Jane was HORRIBLE! She pouted the whole time- wouldn't talk to Diane- and scrunched her nose and kept her head down.....